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From The Street by Joshua Maerker - January '03
Okay, as I sit here, staring at my computer screen in my backroom, I await creative inspiration... Yeah, right. I'll admit this month's FTS is actually going to be more randon neural firings than anything, because, quite frankly, my mind is JELLO right now.

First thing's first... I'm working again! That's right, your favorite writer and columnist has a real job... If you all remember my first column, you'll know I was working for Cingular Wireless (What a bunch of LOSERS they are!) as a CSR. Well, that job didn't seem to like me, so they fired me. Lemme tell you all, them firing my ass was the BEST THING to happen to me! It's made me realize that, although it DOES take money to survive in this world, it doesn't take money to be happy. Good case in point here is this... During my birthday (It's July 7, and NONE OF YOU ASSHOLES GOT ME ANYTHING! See if the Easter Bunny doesn't shit in your basket this year...), my best friend (as well as the team leader for my racing team) took me out for a night of pool and cars, which, so far, has been the BEST birthday I've had yet! I didn't have to put up with any shit that night, and I enjoyed myself... It's the simple things that really we're all about. Let's face it, with our hobbies, it DOES take money to get them going, but the pleasure of just ripping into the car you own and working with it with your own two hands makes even the most expensive stuff seem like nothing. We want our rides looking tight! Does this drive us to do the impossible? HELL YES! Another good case in point here is my buddy Cameron, and personal friend of the ESR team. He's a fellow Saturn enthusiast, and he has proudly stated accurately that his SL2 is, and I quote, "The most hybrid Saturn on the Planet." I've seen this car, and it's not the most hybrid Saturn on the Planet... It's the most Hybrid Saturn in the UNIVERSE! He's poured a LOT of time and effort into that car, and he's VERY proud of it, not to mention everyone who's seen it (save for a few assholes here and there) have all said that his car is awesome. I tend to agree here on this one...

Okay, more random blitherings... I started back on my work to my car, much thanks to being employed, as well as for the weather to be actually COOPERATIVE for once! My headliner is done, and in about a week or two, I'll have my new clutch installed... It's all coming together now, and I can assure you all that you'll be seeing the completed product! Stay tuned...

One final thing for Random Blitherings... Have you ever noticed when you get ANY form of work done to your car, it seems like your car runs better, even if it's work that has NOTHING to do with the actual engine? I mean, right after the headliner was replaced, I noticed that my car felt... well... different! It actually responded better, which I know is impossible since, last time I checked, the headliner had nothing to do with the engine. Hmmmmmmmm could this be one of those car mysteries that we may never figure out? Probably... Nothing says that we make sense at times, you know...

Of course, you know this isn't me talking here... It's just words from the street.